Journey's End, New Beginning
by Friend of the ABC
Summary: The Doctor was with her, and yet still out there. Rose sorts through her emotions. Post-Journey's End


They found a small seaside hotel in the village near Bad Wolf Bay. It was run by a smiling, round-faced, middle-aged couple who did not seem to think anything of the threesome that stepped into lobby – three English tourists who did not have their bags, who had barely any money and who looked as if they had just seen the end of the world.

"Right," said Jackie awkwardly before they moved to the front desk. "I'm useless when it comes to allocating rooms." She looked from Rose to the Doctor and back to Rose again.

"You can have your own room," said the Doctor. "And I'll share with Rose, if that's… alright… with her." He turned to look at Rose, who had not said anything since they left the beach. She hadn't even held his hand as they walked to the village.

"Yeah, it's alright," she said very softly, looking directly at her mother.

Jackie gave the Doctor and Rose a sad look before going to the front desk to negotiate in the bit of Norwegian she'd picked up the last time they were in Norway.

The Doctor watched Rose drift over to a window overlooking Bad Wolf Bay. He couldn't see where they'd landed, but he knew she was looking for that spot. It was on that spot where she'd said her goodbye, the goodbye he never finished saying; and it was on that spot where they were reunited.

He slowly moved towards her, but did not touch her.

"Donna can't stay with him," he said softly. In a way, he comforted her and yet made her distressed: comforted in that Rose now knew that the new companion couldn't be with her Doctor, and yet distressed because the Doctor would be alone again.

"Why not?" asked Rose. He didn't know this, but she was looking at his reflection in the glass of the window. Ironic, considering that the man behind her was, in a way, a reflection of the one she fell in love with.

"She's got Time Lord knowledge in her now," said the Doctor. "Her human mind cannot bear it."

"Like me when I absorbed the Time Vortex."

"Yes." Despite himself, he smiled. _Our first kiss, Rose. Don't you remember? I was a different man back then… I didn't have hair. _His grin broadened.

Rose wondered why the Doctor was smiling. Whatever the reason, she liked seeing that smile. She smiled at the glass.

"Was that a smile?" asked the Doctor, seeing her reflection in the glass.

"Yes," she admitted.

Jackie returned. "Your room," she said, handing the key to the Doctor. 201.

"Come on, Rose," he said.

Obediently, Rose tore her gaze away from the bay and followed the Doctor up the steps. She watched the way he walked up the steps – it was the same gait, the same bounce to his step which always made her grin.

"Here it is, then," said the Doctor, inserting the key into the lock. "201."

She followed the Doctor in. Almost instinctively, she went to the window, hoping to see the bay. She saw a field, fences and a few cows. It reminded her a little of Wales. Or Wales back in the world where she'd been born. She hadn't been to Wales in this new world yet.

Every nerve in the Doctor's body was tingling. His palms started getting sweaty. He'd played this scene over and over in his mind before, but now that it was here… He licked his lips and took a step towards Rose.

Rose felt his arms encircle her. She leaned her head back and rested it against him.

"I've wanted this for so long…," he whispered in her ear.

"Me, too," she whispered back.

The Doctor's lips found hers. All the emptiness which he'd been carrying with him through the years after Rose seemed to melt away. He didn't have to worry about being the saviour of the universe anymore. All that mattered was Rose now. The world could wait.

He was removing her shirt when she suddenly stepped away.

"Wha—?" He opened his eyes in time to see her running towards the door. She slammed it behind her.

The Doctor went downstairs and found her by the same window again, the one that overlooked Bad Wolf Bay. Her forehead was pressed on the glass, misting the cold surface. He went and stood next to her, and they both looked out at the bay.

"I keep expecting him to come back," she said. "I spent so long expecting… and waiting…" She looked at him. There were tears in her eyes.

"But at the same time," she said, "you _are _him. And yet…" She turned back to the window. "He's still out there."

The selfish part of the Doctor wanted to be upset at Rose, but the Time Lord part of him said, "Yeah, I don't blame you. You saw two of us standing there – two _identical _people in one place. That defies a lot of your human laws…"

Rose wiped her eyes. "I feel as if I don't deserve to be happy because he isn't happy."

"He's happy," said the Doctor quietly, "because I'm with you and you're with me. So technically, you're with him." He shook his head. "It's all very strange." He was usless at comforting people.

"But…"

"It's like when I regenerated," said the Doctor. "It was me, and yet it wasn't me. This is the same, only I am really me." He reached out and touched Rose's hand. "The walls have closed, Rose. He isn't in this universe."

"But he still _is _out there," insisted Rose.

Suddenly, she couldn't stand being around the Doctor. She needed to get some fresh air.

"I'm going outside," she said.

The air was cool and smelt salty. It cleared Rose's head and dried the tears on her cheeks. For a moment, she considered walking down to the bay again. It wasn't a very far walk.

Then, Jackie appeared beside her.

"I've just gotten off the phone with your dad," she said. "He'll send a plane over tomorrow morning."

"Home, then," murmured Rose.

"Home." Jackie chuckled. "He says Tony bawls every night for me… Your brother is a screamer, just like you were when you were his age."

Rose couldn't help but smile.

Jackie's tone was light-hearted, but Rose could hear the solemnity veiled beneath it.

"He's exactly the same as the other Doctor," said Jackie. "The same voice, the same smile, the same humour…"

"He _is _the same man," said Rose, although she found it hard to believe it herself.

"It was just like when me and your dad were reunited again, at Canary Wharf," said Jackie. "I found it so hard to believe that it was him, and he found it so hard to believe that it really was me…"

"But your Pete died," said Rose, turning to her mother, "and Dad's Jackie died. For me, my Doctor—"

"Is here," Jackie interrupted. She took her daughter's hands. "You waited so long for him, Rose…" Here, words failed her. She sighed and finished with, "You'll be fine, Rose. You'll be fine…" She kissed her daughter's cheek and went back inside.

Rose sat down on the grass and tried to sort her thoughts out.

_Donna can't stay with him… _So the other Doctor will be lonely again, the lonesome traveller in space… "Lonely angel" someone had called him once. Reinette. She'd wanted to see the stars, but she ended up dying young in Versailles. _I'm luckier than her, _thought Rose.

She thought about Mickey, who chose to remain in the other universe. She thought about how he'd stayed beside her through the months after Doomsday while caring for his gran. He kept trying to get through to her again. For a while, she did return those affections; but then she decided she wasn't being fair to him and decided to let him go – she couldn't touch or kiss him without thinking of the Doctor.

"I fell in love with the Doctor," she had said to him, "and it's the Doctor that I'm still in love with."

Then Rose thought, _If it's the Doctor I fell in love with, and if it's the same man who is waiting for me, then I am in love with the man in the hotel._

Rose looked up at the sky. _I spent so long waiting for him, expecting him to come back… _

_And now he's here… _

Rose stood up and went back into the hotel. The Doctor was still in the lobby. He was playing with two little boys. They were laughing and jabbering on in Norwegian. When the Doctor saw Rose come in, he shooed them off. They ran away, giggling and talking amongst themselves. His face was serious, fearful and expectant as he stood up.

"Everything alright, then, Rose?" he asked.

She smiled. "Fantastic."

**A/N: **Sorry if this is a bit messy… The logic and stuff behind _Journey's End _also scrambled my mind, and this fic is largely me (as Rose) sorting out my thoughts behind the episode. Please review! Maybe I'll rewrite this once I've thought through it enough. Ha, ha.


End file.
